she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
