Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
