why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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