I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
