holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Randomize
