smell my finger.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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