My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
