You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
