Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
