Please, let me fuck your mom
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
