you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
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