Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Randomize
