scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
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