did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Randomize
