sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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