She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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