YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
