Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
