Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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