I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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