Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
