fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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