He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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