I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
