dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
