If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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