How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
