i think my mom watched the whole time
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
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