I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
