He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I am mentally ready for anal.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
