Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize