i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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