That's intense
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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