the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
