Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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