You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Randomize
