just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
