Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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