He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
