It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
