Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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