i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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