you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
