I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
