marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
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