Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
