My brain says no but my pants say off.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
