yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
