He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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