So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
