So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
